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Nikki Graham was my first friend when I was 12 and she was 14. We were recovering from an eating disorder in the hospital and had a connection from the moment we saw each other on the stairs.
I felt we were always meant to meet; She lived down the road from me, both of our parents are divorced, and we have a similar upbringing. Even when we were in different hospitals at different times, the same nurse took care of us. I could tell she was in poor shape, though.
Being in the clinic was sometimes a nightmare. We were fed through a tube that came down our nose and into our parrots (gas tube feeding), and we could cry and scream out of our rooms. But we had a great time there, getting caught up in mischief like a group of young girls. We had secret sleepovers and do shows (our favorite is the Stаrlight Express). We have witnessed riots and we bring to be a lot of difficulties for others.
When we were in our twenties and living in an apartment in Northwood, the fun continued. Those were one of the most memorable days of my life. We would go out every Thursday night to shining, get drunk frequently despite our little money, and then come home and sleep in the quiet bed. Nick was cool because she was so cold, and I’d wake up in the middle of the night, freezing, with her legs wrapped around my shoulder.
She dreamed of appearing on the older brother. I took her to her interrogation, and after being in line for hours, she was about to release a boy she liked and asked for a meeting. He was wandering while listening, which she forced her to do. I picked up the phone! In the middle of listening, who answers their phone? However, it has received from producers as a result. Nikki can’t help but be tired.
I had no idea she was going to get in until I saw her on TV, dressed in a pink bunny outfit and introduced by Davina McCall. She said she’d go with her mom, Sue, but the night before she went to Big Brother, we were sitting in our house together and she asked me to sing Christina Aguiler’s song “I Move To You.” When I sang to her, I was overjoyed. I suppose she knew we weren’t going to see anything else for a while and needed some rest, but I wasn’t surprised to see her exit from Chаnnel 4. “Yeah, that’s Nikki, makes sense,” I just thought.
Having Nikki on TV wasn’t a concern for me. I was happy to see it succeed. I knew she needed something to distract her from her illness, she was about to turn back. The older brother cheated on her. She was indebted to everyone involved in producing the show for giving her life and a sense of self in the midst of her illness. Since she seemed so happy, I used to go to sleep eating live food at home 24 hours a day. I was incredibly overwhelmed by her accomplishments.
Some people may develop claustrophobia or boredom, but Nikki has not been affected by being confined to her home, due to her extensive hosting experience. Everyone was petting her because she was exactly the same in the room. She needed everyone who could accept her.
Nikki was a hopeless romantic and eccentric in my memory. She, like me, had always been in search of her true love (she had decided to marry a Frenchman!). I’m sure we’ve met before. When Nikki was healthy, she was a free spirit, but her illness caught her in a cage she couldn’t break free from.
I still think Nikki will come off the brink in 2020, when she was very ill. She looked like she’s living nine lives, and we knew we had to do something to help her get better. She was determined to get better.
“We’ll raise £10,000 to send to a nice resort or something,” we’re back to create a GoFundMe account. We did not expect such a positive response. I should think of Rylаn [Clаrk, who used to host Big Brother’s sister show, Big Brother’s Bit on the Side] Retweet Page – We raised £75,000 before we retweeted it. Nikki was a little touched that people were donating money to her, but she was thankful nonetheless.
I couldn’t believe Nikki died last April. I was obsessed with remembering it and posting pictures of us together at first, but it’s still pretty soulful even now. When I think of her, I immediately start crying, finding clips of her on Big Brother on social media is really hard. My life changed drastically. To get around losing my right, I had to build some build tools.
I now work at the guest house where I met Nikki and I help young people with disorders. When I told her I was considering working there, she encouraged me to do so because she thought I would be happy to do so. I want to help the people who are suffering from this terrible disease that is holding back the souls of these beautiful young women. In some ways, I feel like I’m not only helping myself but also helping Nikki.
It has to be believed that it was only because you spoke to her for the last time.
Nikki was my best friend all of a sudden. It is difficult for me to imagine my future life, especially marriage, without her. Seems like a long shot. She is the only friend I will ever have. She was the person I’ve been passionate about my whole life.
As told to Emily Packer
Who is Nikki Grammy and what does she do? Thursday 4 at 9 pm every Thursday
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